Cin cin!

Last night we had some friends over for a wine tasting.  Brandon and I went to a local wine shop to get some ideas for which wines we should serve.  I told the owner what kind of wine everyone likes and the food I was serving, and she suggested an excellent selection of vino!  We had wine from Italy, California, South Africa, Argentina and Australia. 

We had a great time with friends and enjoyed delicious food and wine.  This is definitely something we will have to do again in the very near future!!  Here was one of our favorites:



Amberhill Secret Blend (Red)



If you are a wine drinker, here is a list of the wines we tasted that you might enjoy:

Cornale’ Chardonnay – sparkling Chardonnay.  Great for cleansing your palate to start a wine tasting!

Valley of the Moon Pinot Blanc

Cederberg Chenin Blanc

Amberhill Secret Blend – even if you aren’t usually a red wine drinker, you will probably like this one.

Sophenia Reserve Malbec

Hardys Whiskers Blake Classic Tawny – dessert wine that is great with biscotti.

For now I will leave you with a couple of pictures of our furry babies:



Long Legged Kendall




Sweet Diesel aka The Black Beast



 Salute!

Our Story

I linked up with Kelly’s Korner on Friday so for those of you that don’t know me, I thought now would be a good time to share our story.  If you are new to the blog and especially if you found me through Kelly’s Korner, thank you stopping by and following me and my journey through life!

Brandon and I met in 2006 while we were both taking a Dale Carnegie class.  I would like to say that it was love at first sight, but it wasn’t quite like that.  We didn’t really even talk to each other until the last couple of classes.  After talking several times after class, emailing and talking on the phone, we went out on our first date.  Our first date consisted of meeting almost all of Brandon’s family, which was slightly overwhelming for the quiet only child. 

We love a lot of the same things, including the South Carolina Gamecocks.  Almost a year into our relationship, my aunt and uncle had season passes to the football games on the 50 yard line.  We bought two of the tickets and I think Brandon was in heaven.  I’m pretty sure this was the only reason Brandon proposed to me, but little did he know that the season football tickets were about to end.  At least he still decided to proceed with the wedding! J

In April of 2008, we got married and I moved up to North Carolina where he was living at the time.  We started our lives as a married couple and had all of our hopes and dreams to look forward to and share together.  Other than a few bumps in the road job-wise, everything was going great.  We were finally able to buy a house, travel and do most of the things we had talked about doing.

About a year after we got married, we decided we wanted to start a family.  We thought that this process would be easy and in no time we would be looking forward to having a family of 3.  Little did we know that almost 3 years later, we would still be waiting for our family of 3.  After both undergoing a lot of tests, we finally consulted with an infertility specialist.  I remember walking out of the first consultation thinking “how did we get here?  Wasn’t this supposed to be easy?  What should we do now?  Are we going to be able to afford this?”  There are so many questions and not a lot of answers when you struggle with infertility.  After 2 rounds of Invitro-Fertilization, I still feel lost.  Where do we go from here?  Do I really want to do this again?  Can I handle the emotional and physical stress this puts on me and my husband again?  What if it doesn’t work next time? 

If you have struggled with infertility then you know how emotionally draining it is.  It makes you feel like there is something wrong with you – like what can I do differently or what can I change to change the outcome.  It is also very lonely.  I know that I have my husband, but I think women’s feelings about being a mother are so much different than a man’s feelings.  I have really struggled with so many people in my life being pregnant right now.  I want to be happy for them, but it is really hard.  It has nothing to do with the individual, but the circumstance.  I try so hard to be happy for others, but some days it is just unbearable and I can’t fake my sadness.  I know over time things will get easier! 

I am thankful to have such a wonderful husband to go through this with.  My husband is the most loving and supportive husband in the world.  I couldn’t imagine having to go through this with anyone else by my side and always be there to hold my hand.   He is my rock and is always there for me.  I also find comfort in reading other people’s stories, so if you have a blog about infertility and your life’s struggles, thank you for sharing.  Just knowing that other people out there have similar situations makes me feel less alone.  If you are just starting on this journey and have questions or concerns about IVF, please feel free to leave a comment or send me an email.  Thank you again for taking the time to check out my blog!

Bad Things come in 3’s

To say that the second half of last year and the beginning of this year sucked is an understatement.  It seemed like anything that could go wrong did and that there was so much heartbreak that it got to be unbearable.  Let me tell you what happened:

1.      In August, my husband and I found out that the only way we would be able to have kids is through In Vitro Fertilization.  You have all of these hopes and dreams when you first get married about one day having a family and an “easy” life.  In a matter of minutes, it seemed like all of that had been taken away and everything seemed impossible.  They were very hopeful that we would have success with In Vitro, so we started with the process late August early September.  For someone who hates needles, you quickly have to become accustomed to them.  With daily injections and a roller coaster of hormones, we were well on our way to the expansion of our family.  Or so we thought.  The day we went for the embryo transfer (implantation), the doctor told us that our chances of getting pregnant were only about 40%.  Needless to say, we left feeling slightly depressed and worried but still held on to the hope it would work.  A few days after my birthday, we found out that the embryo didn’t implant and that we weren’t pregnant.  I was sad but still hopeful that this would work – just not this time.

2.       A week before Thanksgiving, our Great Dane, Addison, got very sick and ended up being admitted to a vet specialist hospital in Greenville.  After staying there for a week, 2 blood transfusions, a diagnosis of hemolytic anemia, lots of medication and lots of $$, we finally got to bring her home.  I was so excited to finally have my furry baby back home where she belonged.  She was a goofy dog that could always make you laugh no matter what mood you were in.  She would feel when I was sad and would climb up in the chair and cuddle with me.  I couldn’t have been more excited to have her back home!  A week or so after Thanksgiving, she took a turn for the worst and got a blood clot.  We took her back to the specialist and were informed that she probably had cancer and her condition would only get worse.  We made the only humane choice we had and let her go.  There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t miss her but time does heal all wounds.  She will always be a part of our family and will always have a place in my heart.  Here are a few pictures of my beautiful baby:

3.       We were already in the middle of another round of In Vitro when Addison got sick, so we decided to proceed.  The hope was that she had to leave us to make room for a baby.  After more injections and procedures, we went for our embryo transfer.  Again we received about the same projected results as the first time and left not knowing what to think.  We still remained hopeful that things would work out.  Two days after Christmas, I found out I was pregnant.  We were so excited and I’d never been happier in my life.  My mind was going crazy with thoughts of names, things we would do with this child as they grow up, what kind of parents we would be, would it be a boy or girl and so on.  Then on New Year’s Eve, we found out I was having a miscarriage.  Everything in the world seemed to be turning against us and there were no reasons why.  All I could think was, why not me?   We have so much to offer a child, so why not me?  Then our doctor’s appointments went from “you might be pregnant again” to “you might have an ectopic pregnancy” to “you might be pregnant again” to “you are definitely having a miscarriage” – all in a matter of a couple of weeks.  Finally at the end of January, I had to have a D&C – hello 2012!

It has been a really hard road and journey, but we still do remain hopeful that we will have a child one day (whether biologically or not).  I know that God has a plan for us even if we don’t see it right now.  Everything happens for a reason and it just wasn’t the right time.  One thing that has really helped me heal is a sermon by Steven Furtick from Elevation Church in Charlotte (Blessed and Broken).  People thank God for blessings but think He has turned his back when we are broken.  I have to remember that He is there no matter what.

I have been so blessed in my life with a wonderful husband, great job, and a roof over my head and so much more.  Sometimes the broken times in my life make me forget all of the things God has provided.  I am sharing all of this with you so that if you are going through hard times please you know you are not alone.  It isn’t about how many times we fall – it’s about how many times we get back up and brush ourselves off.

P.S.  Sorry this post was so long! 

A Carb-Loaded Meal

We have the best friends in the world!  When we want to eat an unhealthy meal without being judged, we always call our friends Reeses and Frenchy (I renamed them to keep them anonymous!). I love them because we have a lot in common and are at similar stages in our lives.  They have been there through a lot of hard times and we truly appreciate their friendship.  We always have a great time together and laugh a lot especially when I bust out dancing for no reason (I like to Zumba and pretend I am a professional hip-hop and Latino dancer).

Last night we went to one of my favorite high carb restaurants, Carrabba's.  How can you get out of that place without eating at least one loaf of bread?!  The food is so good that I think it has crack in it or something.  Last night I had the tilapia and they didn't disappoint. 

When I whipped out my fancy big camera, my husband looked at me and said "Really?!"  I said "Yes, it's for the blog!"  I don't think he is quite into the whole blog thing yet, but he will get used to my craziness!  I am hoping to try a new local restaurant at least once a month (yes, I know Carrabba's doesn't count).  I will blog the good and bad in case you are ever in the Asheville area. 

For now, goodnight blog world!

Welcome to my Blog!

So, I caved!  I started a blog, which is one thing I thought I would never do!  I thought if everyone else has one, why not me?!  I started this blog to document things in my life that may or may not be interesting to anyone else other than me.  I also started this in hopes that other people could relate to my experiences, journey and life’s struggles.  I hope you enjoy reading my blog and that I don’t bore you with too many pictures of my dogs!  Let me tell you a little about myself…

I am a wife and mother to 2 Great Danes.  I have a wonderful husband who loves me and puts up with me and my moodiness every day.  We love to travel and hang out with our friends and family.  I am attempting to train for a ½ marathon for our goddaughter’s foundation (more on that later!), which is challenging and crazy but I am loving it.  We have struggled for several years to start a family and are learning to deal with the ups and mostly downs of that process.

I hope that you enjoy my blog and reading about my experiences.  I hope that I can inspire or help you through my life’s challenges and struggles.   I hope to make you laugh and not embarrass myself.  Nothing will be grammatically correct, so I apologize in advance for all of the “English” people out there reading this!  Thank you for reading my blog and following the days in the life of Jesse.  For now, I will leave you with a picture of my furry babies (btw - I usually take blurry pictures, so I will have my husband be my photographer in the future):



Kendall and Diesel